26 / 10 / 2021
God, the giver of rest
Matthew 11:28-29
"Come to me, all of you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take up my yoke and learn from me, because I am lowly and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls."
Rest, true rest, was such an abstract idea for me. During one of the most hectic and stressful seasons of my life, I remembered turning to a friend feeling exhausted, defeated and weary from having to juggle all the roles I felt the Lord placed on my shoulders. It was then she told me that I needed to find rest in all the work I was doing. I broke down crying in frustration for if I could, I would, I just did not know how. At that time, I was desperate for rest, yet it was nowhere to be found.
Soon after that season passed, I began to contemplate what it meant to seek rest. I recognised that in times where I am most weary and burdened, I often feel the great temptation to procrastinate or give in to sloth as a method of running away. Sometimes I would even sleep through my days to avoid such feelings, convincing myself that they would leave once I wake up. But they never do and I wind up feeling even more restless in my heart. Determined to do better, I began delving deeper into the roots of these unhealthy habits.
Upon reflection, I realised that these habits were not born out of laziness or because I was afraid of confronting my work but because I had been in survival mode since I was a child. Now, I did not grow up in a dysfunctional family or had a difficult childhood, I grew up with parents who cared and loved me deeply, but despite their love for me, there were areas in my life as a child where my needs were unmet. Furthermore, I remembered my mother constantly reminding my siblings and I that we will be on our own at the end of the day and that we can only lean on ourselves, even when we needed help. These led me to believe subconsciously that only I can take care and provide for myself which added a tremendous weight on my yoke, because the reality is that I, unlike God, do not have the means nor power to provide. To be honest, sometimes I don’t even know what my true needs are.
My need to rest cannot be found in myself but in Jesus who desires to give me rest.
Reflection questions:
What are the areas in my life that I still desire control over and why?
How is Jesus inviting me to lay down these burdens and find rest in Him?
This also indicates that my need to rest cannot be found in myself but in Jesus who desires to give me rest. Through this podcast, He continues to invite me to trust Him to be my provider and assures me that I do not have to remain in survival mode for I am safe in Him. Truly, because of Jesus, my yoke is easy and my is burden light, since I no longer need to grow weary from working to provide for myself, as in Him I am seen, known and loved.